WHY WONT MY FISH DIE?

I decided I wanted a dog one day and to my dismay, PetSmart does not sell dogs. I walked out the door with 2 glow in the dark fish instead. They do not compare, but I thought it would be a good way for me to learn some responsibility and see if I could actually have a dog. Well, just like a predicted one, Pink Panther, died within two days. But, Mandarin, is still alive. It has been over 3 months. Mind you, Mandarin survived a week of spring break without food, Easter without food, and I am sure a few other days here and there. It is shocking to me that this little fish is holding its' own. Not to mention I think it might be pregnant or just a little heavy. I am the only one of my friends who has had a fish survive more than a month at college. I do not know what it is, but I like how persistent Mandarin is.

As stupid as it sounds, it still satisfies me to wake up every morning to see the fish swimming around. Also it has taught me the lesson that sometimes no matter what you do, you are going to always have to deal with things. There is always going to be that one person you do not get along with, but they are in every one of your classes. There is always going to be someone better than you. But it has shown me it matters how you deal with things. Now, I make sure someone comes over to feed my fish when I am gone. I realized I am going to have to finish what I started. A flip-id decision to buy a fish one day has made me more aware. There is always going to be something going for you, even when you can't see it.

WHAT IS MY HUSBAND DOING?

Well sometimes I do not know where my friends' heads are at. Today we were sitting around eating salt and vinegar chips and all of a sudden someone says, "It's time for my favorite game!"

"What's my husband doing?" I didn't get it, but basically you say what you think your future husband is doing right at this moment. So the first answer is, "He is sailing on a yacht with his family in the Virgin Islands." And she goes in to more and more detail. I literally could not sit there with a straight face, I was dying laughing the entire time. Like who thinks to play this game.

I didn't know whether or not to take it seriously or light hearted. Are people really this desperate that they need to make up some life? I know it was all fun and games for my friends, but I really do think some people are caught up in a fantasy world. Because certain people break the image of being successful without education it gives everyone hope. I am all for hope, but everyone is not going to be Bill Gates. You need to put some effort into your life and don't sit around and wait for something good to come your way. You have to make things move. Most of the time it is a climb to get there and you might struggle a lot, but isn't that what makes us human? It is a happy, scary thought to think about what our world would be like if every single person got up and did something and didn't wait for it to come to them. It is far from reality though, because we are going to have those people who dream about what they want and some how get it, even though they didn't have to work at all. And then you think, life's not fair.

COMMUNITY SERVICE

Should community service be a requirement, or should people want to do it ? There has been a recent debate in my sorority about community service. People did not fulfill their service hours. The only problem is I am starting to doubt why people are actually doing the service in the first place. I love the concept of community service and think it is a must have to be a well rounded, moral person. But in today's society kids must do it so they get into the college they want or they must complete hours when they are in trouble with the law. So what happened to the true meaning of community service?

I know that people must be exposed to community service in the first place, everyone has to start somewhere. The next step is where a sour taste is left in my mouth. It is not a trendy thing to do. I think it is great people are wanting to help others, but they should be doing it because they want to, not because it is cool or it is required. I am not sure how the problem will get fixed, but I find it a little ironic the means some people have for doing service work. At the end of the day it really doesn't matter because people are being helped, even if it is with the wrong intentions.

RESPONSIBLE ADVERTISING

I actually believe advertising is a lot more responsible in society than most people think. I probably have a skewed view, but still I do not think people give it enough credit. I define responsible advertising as a message presented to people with a truthful, accountable meaning. That is where I believe I differ. I think an ad does not have to be "good" to be socially responsible. An ad could be for condoms, but if it tells the truth and provides information to the consumer without deceiving them, then how is it not socially responsible?

Also, it does not need to be "green" or or a social cause, I think most people jump to this as a plausible definition. The problem is some people can turn people against anything, and that is why some advertising has gotten a bad reputation. It always perplexes me that people can be so unreasonable. I think it comes to me naturally because I think of myself as a morally sound person and I know what I stand for. It is a no brainer to me that all advertising should be responsible and since we know that is effects so many people, why is it so hard to make an ad accountable for what it represents?

THESE MOTHERS TODAY

With recent attention being drawn to Kate Gosselin on Dancing with the Stars, I think she needs a reality check. It disgusts me how she is now in the spotlight. She should be at home with her 8 children taking care of them. I cannot wait to see what trouble those kids get into as the years progress. She prides herself on being this "wonderful" mom of 8 children, but at the same time her life is falling apart. It is hard enough to go through the divorce publicly, but really? You do not think your kids need a break. If I was her daughter, I would not be a happy camper. Kate's values are completely screwed up. You are not that cool. Same with octomom. She used her children as a way to gain publicity, rather than actually raise them. Something needs to happen here. I cannot even fathom the reasoning in these two mothers' heads, to make what they are doing okay. Sure they have hard situations presented to them, but so does every other American. And do you see us exploiting our families? No.

The problem is their children are going to suffer from the lack of value in their lives. The mothers are setting the stage to say, "hey if you're getting paid do it". What a bad line to live by. And we wonder why America's children are suffering. It is because the parents are doing their job, or even trying to do their job. I hope some day people see what they are doing to their children. No one is ever perfect, but there has to be a line where you need to be a parent, not a selfish person.

EMBARRASSMENT FOR HELP

As I was sitting in class, the teacher asked a question and no one responded. Why? Because they are too embarrassed. Are teachers really asking too much of students? I think not, but I do think students do not reciprocate well to being put on the spot because some people are very judgmental. Students are emotionally scarred from past events. It takes a certain person to stand up and answer a question and be wrong and it be okay. And that is what we need to make more clear. That it is okay for you to speak your mind without being stupid. I think that is the one thing that needs to be changed in society for anything else to be changed. Think of all the wonderful creative ideas we would have if no one ever shut them down. It would be unreal the opportunities for change. I think this will be a hard thing to actually get done, because it has been conditioned so much into the lives of so many people. It will take awhile, but if it could actually happen, it would be unreal the positive effects that would come from it.

HANDWRITING

Handwriting is just one of those things I cannot perfect. One day I like how I write, the next I don't. But I always like the style of other peoples'. Everyday I think to myself if only I could make my letters combine that way. I guess it is a sad reality that I will not be able to ever write exactly how I want to. But, I also love that about handwriting. No matter how hard someone tries they can never take it away from you. Or at least they have to go to great lengths to try.

There are not many things in society that are solely your own. Almost everything can be duplicated, and it is a scary thought. What ever happened to being an individual and not conforming? I think it still exists, but in greater genres. I think people are individuals within a greater group. But there are always those few that stand out no matter what, and that I think is what we should all strive to be.

PASSOVER PUPPETS

While watching the Colbert Report last night the "Passover Finger Puppets" were brought to my attention. Oh the irony. It blows my mind that such a religious holiday with the meaning of life instilled can be commercialized. Same thing with Christmas, it is no longer about the meaning, but the gift giving. So who's to blame?

EVERYONE. No single entity can be credited with the commercialization of religion. Our society has just become one that is focused on the main stream activity. If its' cool then you bet it is going to happen. Religion is such a sacred thing, I think it is forgotten. But I am not sure if there is a way to install the secrecy back. Once something has been commercially exploited, you cannot really take it as serious as you did before. But there is a way to further prevent it from this. If the buzz around religion slows down, I think some of the people who say they are religious will fade away and the true values will shine through. People are beginning to see religion is a meaningful tradition, not just a fade.

THE RIGHT INTENTIONS

My roommate just adopted a puppy from the pound. She is an impulse buyer. She went and bought the puppy, Charley, a bed, toys and all the other essentials. Charley was already spoiled and she had been home one day. My roommate took her to the park all day the next day, where they played for hours. Then her parents found out she adopted a dog. All hell broke loose. Her dad "called" the animal control and cut her off from their funds. So without telling anyone she took the puppy back after living with her for 4 days. What a selfish thing of her to do. She did not think about anyone else except herself, and that she wanted a puppy. But now she has traumatized this puppy for life. She had the right intentions, but completely screwed the puppy over. It kills me to think that Charley could possibly be put to sleep because my roommate was too selfish and impulsively bought her. I think this happens a lot in society today. People always have the right intentions, but they do not think about the consequences. Such a simple thing to realize, but it is often looked over.

LENSE

As I wake up every morning I brush my teeth, wash my face, and put in my contacts. It is my routine, I do this every single morning of my life. However, I never thought about the fact that when I put my contact lenses in, I am not only doing it so I can see. I am putting in the lens of every single moment in my life that has created my viewpoint. I completely forgot to think of things in other peoples' views. We live such a sheltered life and in such sheltered communities that we forget others' perspectives. I think this is one thing schools need to focus more on. Students do not the entire picture of the real world because they are not taught different. A person must try to get an experience from the outside world, by either going on a mission trip or visiting a third world country. They are never taught these views in school. This epidemic is a sad reality to me. The fact that some parents send their children to "Island School" to get a sense of reality is a joke. We have to outsource children for them to get a real world perspective, because we do not acknowledge our weaknesses as Americans.

I am guilty of it too. I think it is hard to not be sucked in. But I am scared for future generations. Knowing what is really happening in reality is such a vital tool to becoming a moral, appreciative person. Hopefully I am over emphasizing the problem and children are being shown that the world is not manicured lawns and having the right attire for each occasion. But I when I do pay attention to everything in the world that I have been apart of, I really begin to think I am just finding out a sense of what I really am.

SYCOPHANT

Sycophant, such an elegant word with such an ugly meaning. For those of you who do not know sycophant means a self-seeking flatterer. I never would have known this word if it hadn't been for my hair dresser. To my benefit we were having a conversation and the word came up. I had no clue what it meant. But then I found out the meaning and realized that we are surrounded by these people everyday. I feel sorry for them. It disgusts me that our society would let it be acceptable to be someone else's' flatterer. How low can it get? In what other nation is it okay to be someone's bitch? None. It just confirms the role society plays and the emphasis they put on being accepted. If a person is willing to do whatever just to be seen with someone or to have friends, what is the point? I am confused why someone would not want people to be their friends because they like them, not by what they have. It is mind boggling to me that someone would want this. I am probably never going to realize why it is okay, but I am sure it will continue to happen. America needs an ah-ha moment. We need to realize what we are conditioning people to be. This whole idea really shows how our society really does make things socially acceptable, even if it is for the wrong reasons. It is now time that society makes a few changes to what is actually acceptable, for the right reason.

ARTIFICIAL REALITY

From being an only child, I think I tend to observe things a lot more than other people. It has always been in my manor to sit back and look at everything before I jump right in. Recently, I have been awakened by an observation. College students live a fake life. Think about it, and particularly in a girls' world. I am the only girl in my group of friends who has not had plastic surgery of some form done. I have found the most current form of plastic surgery in my friends to be nose jobs. Next its the hair, I am guilty of it changing my hair color too. However, I think the complete transformation of a brunette to a blonde and vice versa has increased recently. Next it's the nails. They are either always painted or they are acrylic. The nails go along nicely with a fake tan and a full face of makeup. Then to top it all off a fake id.

So what's really real? Nothing. It has been a sad realization of mine that the "reality" we live in is mostly consumed of fake things. There have been so many distortions the the human body, that I do not remember the last time I saw someone with everything real. If it's not one thing it's another. I slowly began to think back of the Dove campaign and how honest it is. There needs to be more of an effort to make girls realize it is normal to be completely natural. But there is a strong current against it in society right now. I personally hope that there are more campaigns like Dove's and then maybe people will be enlightened with a true perception of reality.

EDIBLE BURRITO TAPE

As I sat and ate my Chipotle burrito the entire contents fell out and it really enraged me. All I wanted was to sit there and eat my dinner without creating utter chaos. I thought to myself there has to be a way out of this mess. The only thing I could come up with at the time was tape. It makes complete sense, if there was edible tape. I personally know a ton of people who would want to use it. The burrito business would benefit from it and its' consumers. It is a very practical a simple idea that could revolutionize the Mexican food industry.

SIXTH SENSE

After watching the movie, The Sixth Sense, I thought to myself that I have a sixth sense. It is to read peoples' emotions. I do not know why, but I can tell the second someone is about to burst out in tears or when they want to yell someones' head off. I do not know if it is because I am emotional person myself, who is very hard to read, so I get other people better or what. I believe I am going to be able to use this trait to my advantage as I get older and enter a working force and have a family. I wish that the sense was amplified to that I could read minds. That would be the best sixth sense ever. Maybe someday I will actually be able to tell what people are thinking with the technology in the future. That would make my life so much easier, but complicated at the same time. I wonder if my life would turn out like Mel Gibson's in What Women Want. I think I would want to be the person who had the sense when they wanted, and not all of the time.

EYE CONTACT

I was skyping with a friend earlier today and even though I was right in front of him, there was no eye contact made. It was the weirdest thing. I did not get why one of my really close friends could not look me in the eye and talk to me. Its' not like I was the student who did not know the answer in class, who purposely wanted to avoid eye contact, I was just a normal person sitting having a conversation. It really started to bug me, and it made me even more upset that I couldn't find out why someone would do that. There are so many positives about eye contact, but then I started to realize maybe people cannot keep eye contact because they are not confident in themselves. And maybe that it is their entire life lessons that have made them feel this way. If you are just a passer-byer then there is no need to make confident statement. But I know when someone makes eye contact they mean what they say and are sure of themselves. Even if they are wrong, they still make it seem like they are right. Eye contact needs to be taught more in childhood, because it is one of the best and worst things about a person.

CHANGE?

Is there really a need for change in the world? The use and point of coins really does not seem that useful anymore. There has to be a better way to keep track of change. I think that there should be a credit card or phone ap that just automatically collects all of the change a person has, and then when there is enough change built up a person can withdraw the amount. There would be a better system for change and keep track of it for the consumer, but it would help the government too. There is no way in the world that all the change can be accounted for, but with the new technology there would always be a way for counting all the change. With the help of the new change idea, consumers would often be less stressed and more organized. If there was only one card they had to keep hold of for all the change, then life would be simpler for them. I believe this is one way that the government can help ease the life of citizens.

EVERYTHING IS THE SAME

I have slightly begun to believe everything is made the same way. People come up with an idea and then after that a lot of people work on the idea and make it happen. Of course there are certain specifics within a genre, but the concept is the same. This brutally, weird, honest, idea came to me while thinking about how skin appears on a body. All of these layers essentially make up the outer layer of the skin we see, just like a business or school. But how did skin get created... someone had an idea. No matter the viewpoint, big bang or evolution, it works there was an idea about skin in both realms. Relatively speaking of course, that everything is made the same way, I began to feel a cohesiveness to our world. I often find myself preaching diversity and beliefs, but I started to question what motivated that, and I think the fact of realizing everything is the same can essentially make us different. That is what makes being human beings so unique, we are just like everything else in the world: everything is made the same way. I know some people may question what I am saying and think its complete nonsense, but if you truly think about it all the way down to the simplest form; everything we are around today came from an idea. I think that simple thought gives our world hope, because everyone has a million ideas every day.

DESTRUCTIVE RESPECT

When I rushed in to my 8 am class this morning, I did not even look down. I just got my notes out and began filling in the blanks. My forearm started to feel irritated and then I saw the wonderful works of art done by the past students. The desk was basically chiseled away at for years, and then there were a few added pen scriptures. It really bugged me that someone would disrespect property that was not their own. There are thousands of students that use that desk each year. I particularly do not want to have to rise my arms up to write, so I miss the irritation of the uneven edges against my skin. There is a huge lack of respect for other peoples property today. I do not understand why a simple rule that was ingrained in people when they were young has disappeared. It makes no sense at all to me why someone would purposely disrespect someone. Maybe because they think they will not get caught, but still really?

As I sit here writing this, something jumped at me. Maybe it is not that people are purposely disrespecting the desk, but maybe they are expressing their creativity and individuality. I normally am all for expressing ones' self; I think it is one of the greatest things a person has to offer, but why not do it in another way? If that students that did this to the desk had their own desk, I wonder if they would get mad that someone ruined their desk. It perplexes me. I think there is a hard line to draw between individuality and creativity and a level of respect one must have. And in everyday life, this line is very hard to find. Some people wear things that express themselves, but really disrespect others. Some partake in activities that may rattle someone else's neck. And some draw and create things out of other peoples' property. This will always probably be a huge issue to deal with, but it has sparked my mind to think about how expressing myself may sometimes be offensive or disrespectful to others.

ADVISING REFORM

The entire process of college scheduling needs some help. The people who are advisors are more than welcome to help and mostly know answers, but SMU does not give them much to work with. I think that there needs to be some form or reform in this department. Access is great and gets the job done, but the whole pre-approval of classes just makes no sense. I think the process needs to be reversed. Students should have a list of all the classes they need to graduate, sign up for the classes, and then the advisers keep them on track and approve their courses along the way. I also believe there should be a set of main advisers in one building working on all scheduling and approval options. That way when a student, like me, needs to get a summer school course pre-approved, I am able to do it without running around the campus seven different times for five different signatures. I know I am rambling, but there needs to be a greater connection between SMU and the advisers. The advisers are ready and willing to help, but SMU does not specifically tell them what to do. The idea of reversal and a common center for advising would make life a lot less stressful and more productive for both students and advisers. The question is will it ever get done? I think not, SMU does not seem to listen strongly to opinions when the way is already working. Not working well or efficiently, but just working. SMU needs some advising for a reform, and I think I am not the only one who agrees.

SUPERBOWL COMMERCIAL

Venables Bell & Partners, San Francisco

This is my favorite Superbowl commercial for this year. I think it was witty and creative, but also very relevant to the times. At first when I saw this spot, I thought of all the movies with road blocks, like Twister. That would be a vertical intertextual connection, because Twister is a movie and this is an ad. I also thought of all the crime show on television and the show cheap comical show Cheaters. The Green Police come out of no where and then just get the criminal, this would also be a vertical connection. The first few seconds reminded me of the 7/11 commercials where the cashier is smiling and is being overly nice; that would be a horizontal connection. I was actually at the Superbowl, so I did not get a chance to watch each commercial as it aired. I went home and watched them online the following Tuesday. In our ethics class we talked about this ad and how it applies, because of this somewhat bias opinion to the ad I had a tertiary intertextual connection present. The way the class spoke about that spot, made my view a little tainted. The entire commercial had a vibe to it of a party getting busted, I believe this would be a vertical connection too. There were not that many horizontal connections presented to me from this ad, that is one of the reasons the ad resonated so well. It had never been done before.

METERS

I hate meters. I hate how they always are measuring something, but most of all I hate parking meters. What is the point? There are so many other productive ways an organization can get money. I do not see how parking meters do the world any good. Society tells people they are doing things wrong enough, we do not need parking meters telling us we do not pay enough, when I am pretty sure we do. I know parking meters will never be gone, but there need to be a few improvements. A credit card meter. This would make life so much easier, for the parker and the collector. Not too many people just have a bunch of change with them at all times any more. That is my idea for efficient meter usage. As citizens, we are always being watched or judged, there needs to be more leverage when it comes to this. The credit card meter would just be one simple step to letting our society work naturally, and the consumer being able to do the right thing. This is just one simple thing to give our society a little trust and simplicity back.

SHUT DOWN

Recently I have found myself sitting and thinking about everything I have to do. But, I cannot do it. I do not know why my brain does this to me, but I just shut down. There are a thousand words and images coming at me, but I just do not know what to do with them. It is overload. But for no reason. Why does this happen? Often I get this feeling when I think I should be stressed. Keyword: think. Here is the irony, I am so concerned about not being stress that in return I become stressed. Oh how confusing life is. I imagine this is my brains way of telling me to slow down and realize the things that matter. In a week from now am I really going to be concerned about how my agenda looks or should I be focusing on spending time with people. I should be doing things I want to do, without interfering with the things I have to do. I think that should be my new motto for this stage in my life. I find myself trying to grow up way faster than I should and not just living in the moment. I find that a very hard thing to teach yourself how to do. But I think if I do live that way, I won't have shut downs anymore, because there will be no waste or stress in my life.

WHEN I REALIZED I WAS WRONG...

I have a bad habit of online shopping. No matter what it is I can always find it online cheaper. To my advantage I normally am able to order things off line. And there is my problem. It was not brought to my attention until this summer by my mom of all people. I asked her if I could use the online credit card to buy a dress for an event coming up, she said yes. But then she stopped me and goes: "Wait Ally what are you doing?" I replied, "Buying a dress off line." And the drama began. I guess what I say makes no sense, but I could not wrap my head around the idea that I was saying it wrong. The right way to say it is order online or order from the Internet. Well, I still cannot change my mind. The way I say it just makes sense to me, only no one else gets it. I guess I just combined ordering off online to order offline. I don't know what it is, but I cannot make it right. It is just one of those things that will probably never change. To some extent I will always push that my way is right because I am a strong willed person. I think it says a lot about me that I cannot change my vocabulary. Although it might not be the best in other situations. I have however learned that it is okay to be wrong every once and a while.

I GOTTA FEELING

When my heart races, my eyes rapidly glance, and I become silent; I know I am completely happy. That moment when nothing else matters, but you're sitting on your bed and you know you are actually, truly, deeply happy: that's my passion. It happens to me every one and a while, I wish it would happen more. For some reason it has been happening a lot this month. I feel like everything is synchronizing in my life the right way. I always am searching for that feeling. I often find myself sitting around or working on homework thinking what am I doing. I just get stressed when I ask myself that question because I am looking for an answer, but I don't get the result. I try and try to make my thoughts happy or try and think of what I thought before that made me feel that way, but I can't. I became conscious that that is why I feel that way. I cannot contain it. No matter what I do, I cannot make myself get that feeling. Its' not a world stopping feeling, but one that lets me know everything is going to be alright. The more and more I thought about it and I got the main idea. If I live my life every single day to my fullest, that feeling will be there no matter I do or think about.

SOMBREROS

Why don't people wear hats anymore? I sat around in my classroom today and only three people were wearing hats. One a boy with a typical baseball cap, another boy with a striped sock cap, and a girl with a beret. It is freezing out, so it makes sense. For some reason the other thirty students in the class did not get the memo. I think wearing hats has been conditioned out of our society. Some people think it is disrespectful, other associate hats with laziness. However, that is not the case. Hats are just another way to make yourself an individual.

Being conditioned to not wear hats, reminds me of the same argument of creativity. Society ostracizes people who go against the grain. It makes no sense when you really think about it. I am guilty of it too. I often find myself assuming the same way society does, but I am on my way to completely breaking free. Noticing random things everyday really helps me grasp how impacting others are. I am going to take it to heart and wear a hat to class one day, because I want to.

VALUE

The term value has many meanings. I recently came across a new meaning: the degree. In painting class, we were told to make a certain panel of colors. All of the colors were relatively the same, but their value was different. I was only given a basic mixing set and told to make colors I had no clue even existed. I found myself resorting back to elementary ways and mixing yellow and blue to make green. I soon began to conceive the idea there is more. If I wanted to make a dark forest green I couldn't just mix blue and yellow, I had to add more. Adding other colors to my bright green suddenly made the perfect dark forest green, just like in life adding certain aspects to a daily routine can make it just how you want it. Value as the word degree inspires me. There are so many ways to make something matter, but the degree to which you do that is what counts.

BURNS

While I was making a pizza this weekend, I stupidly reached into the oven without an oven mit on, everyone knows what happened next. I burnt my hand. Why I thought I could lift a burning hot pizza out of the oven I do not know. It was the type that did not use a baking sheet, it went directly onto the rack. Because of this slight difference, I thought I can just reach in pick up the edge of the crust and I will be good. Wrong. There was a part of me that wanted to just do it to defy the normal, but in reality it was stupid. It was like asking a person to intentionally be branded. And then I thought how could have this been avoided. It came to me there are things in your life for a reason. The simple oven mit is there for a precautionary measure, just like many randomly simple things. If I had put the oven mit on I would not have a permanent reminder of how stupid I am. There is a part of me that always wants to try and get by without using every little tool, because it complicates life or it takes too long. I should always use the hand sanitizer around the campus, because it really will help prevent becoming sick. I should not pay the two dollars in quarters and park in the garage that I have already paid for. I could name a million things that I should do, but will I really do them? Reflecting on the stupidity of my burn incident, I think I will try and pay more attention to the practical. I seem to think the short way is beneficial, but it never really is. I just re-learned a life lesson every single kindergartner learns when they run the mile: don't cut the turns too short or you will have to run a whole other lap.

SIGNS

Last semester I was faced with a terrible tragedy. My boyfriend, who goes to Miami of Ohio, was involved in a very serious accident. He was in an induced coma for four weeks and the hospital for two months. I kept thinking to myself is this real. Why did this happen? As the long two month journey embarked, I kept questioning everything I was doing. I would fly home every weekend to stand there and watch him helplessly. Then I would come back to school and get what needed to be done done. As all of this was going on little signs kept popping up. The day he was in the accident, I had a horrible headache. It was like ESP. The night before the accident he sent me a text saying I was the only one who made him feel like flying. Two weeks into the accident they could not get him off of the ventilator, the process is known as flying. So the next weekend came and I found this out and I started bawling. Cheesy, I know. But I remembered what he had said to me. I started to pick up on even more and more weird signs. Was he holding my hand consciously even though he was in a coma? I finally had a feeling that I knew it was going to be okay. Someone was sending me signs letting me know that.

It freaked me out when I really started to think about it. I didn't know if my brain was wanting this to turn out positive so bad that it conditioned itself to think this way, or was it real. It still is mind blowing to me and I am not sure if I can really ever wrap my entire brain around the thought. I often found myself thinking. "the doctors are just really good at what they are doing, that's why he is going to be okay". But, was it really them? Did it really help to have all these people praying for him and me seeing all of these signs? My dad the skeptic says it's a bunch of nothing. But, I still sit here consciously hopeful that it all happened the way it was supposed to signs and all. It made me realize that maybe there is something or someone out there who really is watching over us.

ARE THEY REALLY THAT COOL?

It came to my attention last night that some people are obsessed with celebrities. As my roommates looked through gobs and gobs of tabloid magazines, one kept freaking out because one of them had the same dress in their wardrobe as Ashley Tisdale. As some of you know, Ashley Tisdale is a star of the Disney Channel and was in the infamous "High School Musical." Cool, you guys have the same dress, do you really need to tell everyone about it? Why is it so important that the entire world stops for a few minutes just so people know you have the same dress as someone else? Not to mention this same individual prides herself on having "unique, original" style: interesting. So naturally when someone else has the same thing on as her, the whole world comes crashing down. Ironic how the simple spotlight a celebrity has can change how a person reveals his or her values.

What makes them so cool? Why are people so obsessed? It really intrigues me that because of publicity and careers, they are viewed as better than the rest. But are they really better? No, they are just as real as every normal person. It just shows how our society is obsessed with being the best and having the superficial proof that somehow you are better than someone else. Just because you have the same dress as someone is not real proof that you are better than someone, usually people do not want the same thing. But, somehow our society has shaped itself so that a picture of a person in a tabloid wearing the same thing as you means your really cool. This dilemma really scares me for some, but at the same time it often drives people to want better. It made me realize I need to question my reasoning behind justifications, is it superficial or do I really deep down value my reasoning.

RAiNBOWS

So many things are represented by rainbows. I have never really thought about it until I sat down at my computer and saw a rainbow on the screen and a rainbow coded surge protector. Not to mention the whimsical rainbow screen saver present on all the computers. A rainbow is a lot more than just an association, it made me think. I thought about how each person is a color and how it's specific to their personality. A rainbow is a life style of living. Each part of a person makes up a greater whole that creates a stunning masterpiece. And then all of the separate individual rainbows are interlocked because we are all connected by each color. It is a mesmerizing idea. It simplifies our great melting pot of a culture into a concept everyone can understand. It doesn't matter if a persons' rainbow is the traditional roygbiv or the continual mesh of hot colors. I know that my personality rainbow is unlike any other persons', but somehow I am intertwined with the person sitting right next to me. It amazes me that one simple symbol can represent and entire nation individually and all because the surge protector next to me didn't do its' job and sparked an idea.